Here at the Trophy Wife Research Center and Laboratory*, we've 95% sure that you have feelings about breasts. This is because one or more of the following is true:
a) You have breasts
b) You know and/or love someone who has or did at one time have breasts
c) You're a total breast fetishist who has trouble forming a sentence without the word "boobs" in it**
It's impossible to get away from breasts. They're everywhere. Great, right? We're big fans!
Unfortunately, as you may know, there is an ENEMY OF THE BREAST lurking out there in the bosoms of loved ones as well as strangers. This enemy is known as breast cancer, and we at Trophy Wife have decided we are not "into" breast cancer. You can't take boobs away from us without permission. NOT ON OUR WATCH, BREAST CANCER!
Do we need your help? Oh, good question. Yes, actually, we do. The Avon Walk for Breast Cancer is a marathon and a half's walk that takes place over two days. Each walker is required to raise $1800 dollars or more in order to be able to participate. And in order to help us reach our fundraising goals, we're inviting you to the Trophy Wife Benefit for Boobs, a three-hour cavalcade of hilarious improv comedy, all for a good cause (boobs). We very much hope to see you and your impressive chest in attendance.
It's free to get into the benefit - however, we suggest that you make a donation of five to ten dollars. All the proceeds will, of course, go directly to the Avon Foundation.
We love you and love your boobs and boob-related activities,
*Zabeth's Facebook wall
**this maybe only applies to about 32% of you
Kick Drum Decade
LA Improv Comedy Festival Cagematch Champions
The Lusty Horde
A Fully-Improvised Sci-Fi Adventure
Second City Alumni Ithamar Enriquez and Brian Shortall
A Show That Doesn't Mean to Bother You
Improv with a Woman's Touch
The Improvised Rock Opera